Joined: 04/August/2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 26
QuoteReplyTopic: Partner Domestic Situation Posted: 26/October/2009 at 09:13
My partner made a scene yesterday evening after we had an argument by hanging off our apartment balcony, which is on the second floor. To this horror, someone called the police who came running to my apartment thinking it was a suicide attempt. A fire truck was eventually called and the firemen rescue her from the balcony back into the apartment. She claimed to the police officers that she was threatened by me and therefore was attempting a desperate escape. The police took her to the hospital and evaluated her condition and claims for a good 5 hours.
Later the same night, the police called me asked me to stay at a friend's house for the next couple of days. They brought her back to my apartment where she is staying alone now. I am staying at a friend's house.
My question is, are they going to charge me with domestic violence? If so, why did they not arrest me last night? In my defense I did not hit her or threaten her in any way. She has anxiety issues and feels threatened sometimes for no good reason. Specially in this case she risked her life to make a scene. What can I do right now? I have a full time job and unable to concentrate because of all this has happened. I don't feel like going back home yet all my stuff is there. Can they charge her with threatening her own life? Will they charge me?
I do not expect any charge will be made against you, on the information you have given here, however you don't know for sure what was said by her at the hospital, or what the interpretation of the attending police officer was.
Police and fire service were called so there may be some repercussions there, in terms of a bill, but it again will depend on the investigating officers report.
You need to to consider your relationship, these sort of events point to one that is in serious trouble, a visit to a counselor to help you sort out whats right for you, the counselor may wish you to invite your partner along to a subsequent visit, but that will depend on the discussion they have with you.
You might like also to consider making your move from the apartment permanent, counselor could be of assistance.
Lifeline or Relationships Australia are two agencies you could use, there may be others in your area.
I am NOT a lawyer. Anything said is NOT legal advice.
If what you say is true wouldn't you have been the one phoning for assistance??.If you're the loving,sane partner that's what you should be doing,not ignoring her.Second floor is high enough to get hurt.
I panicked and did not know what to do. My train of thought was that any action on my behalf could cause her to jump. I was really horrified by this. I have not been contacted by the police since this incident. I talked to my partner on the phone yesterday and she said she was contacted by protection services to obtain an AVO against me. She did not proceed with that as far as I know. Can they get an AVO for her anyway, without her signature? Can I go back home after a couple of days? She seems to have come back to her senses.
Also, I should mention that she is a visitor in Australia on a Tourist Visa. I was planning on getting married to her and sponsoring her. Should I drop those plans? What happens if she continues to press this issue and her visa expires (Dec 09)? I surely wouldn't want to sponsor her visa if she is pressing charges against me.
Yes, they can impose an AVO on you without her request if the investigating officer considers she is at risk from you. And often this is done, nothing you will be able to do about that. You will find out when it arrives in the mail.
Talk to a counselor about any future plans.
I am NOT a lawyer. Anything said is NOT legal advice.
Unfortunately the police in this instance will make a decision on the AVO regardless if your partner wants it or not.
My advice to you my friend is to get out of this realtionship ASAP. Organise your things and move out the quicker the better.
Considering what has happened you now no longer have a basis for a healthy relationship and certainly not a marriage if you went down that path.
Perhaps contact the police to obtain an update. Even if they proceed with the AVO I doubt you will be charged for anything else since you didn't hit her. The AVO isn't a criminal record but I'd be certainly pushing for the fact that she is not mentally stable which was obvious in the fact she chose to dangle off a balcony to blackmail you.
The police asked me to come in for an interview. They showed me pictures of my partner with a bruise on her back. Apparently she told the police that I hit her. I chose not to speak or comment about it although I do think that she had gotten that bruise from dangling off the balcony. They did not charge me but gave me a court hearing date for the AVO next week. This is done automatically they said. Will they charge me at a later time? I spoke to a lawyer and he said that they usually charge you on the first interview. Where is this going?
Sorry, but we are as much in the dark as you, please let us know how it turns out. You received some good advice from others here, I hope you have followed up on that.
I am NOT a lawyer. Anything said is NOT legal advice.
Yes MartinO, I am actively following the advice from others here. However, this really brings uncertainty and stress to my life. I am waiting to become an Australian Citizen and really did not want to be near a situation like this - let alone be served with an AVO. How will this effect my application for Citizenship?
Not going to help you,that's for sure.Maybe try and be one step ahead and gather some character refs from community members of good standing.If you ever get into a heated argument again with a loved one,or anyone else for that matter,the best course of action is to bite your tongue and remove yourself from the situation.Go book into a motel for a few nights or stay with friends.
Just read through the Aussie Citizenship form and it does not specifically ask for AVOs. Just charges, convictions and guilty pleas. I am hoping I will not be charged with anything.
THIS EXTRACT IS TAKE FROM THE APPLICATION OF CITIZENSHIP:
If you are aged 18 years or over, please answer the following questions:
(a) Have you been convicted of, or found
guilty of, ANY offences overseas or in
Australia (include all traffic offences
which went to court, including offences
declared in your permanent residence
application, and any ‘spent’ convictions)?
(b) Have you been confined in a prison or in
a psychiatric institution by order of a court
made in connection with criminal
proceedings overseas or in Australia?
(c) Have you committed, or been involved in
the commission of war crimes or crimes
against humanity or human rights
overseas or in Australia?
(d) Are you presently under a probation order,
good behaviour bond, on parole, released
on licence or subject to periodic detention
overseas or in Australia?
(e) Are you aware of any proceedings
pending against you overseas or in
Australia for an offence, including
proceedings by way of appeal or review?
(f) Have you ever been involved in any
activity, or been convicted of any offence,
relating to the illegal movement of people
to any country (including Australia)?
(g) Have you ever been charged with any
offence overseas or in Australia that is
currently awaiting legal action?
(h) Have you ever been associated with
terrorist organisations or involved in
acts of terrorism overseas or in Australia?
I honestly thought that this would have been a DVO not AVO - as I have been told by police that DVO will apply in all "domestic (read relationship situations
I think (e) may apply.Best thing to do i think is to appear in court with a lawyer to represent you.The AVO will only be granted if the judge thinks your girlfriend is in genuine danger.What's her current position,is she sticking to her story and pushing for the order?.If you don't show at court they may go ahead and grant the order.
Assault charges are classed as "criminal" matters under the law, the fact that the police didn't charge you on the first interview is a positive sign. "AVO's" are treated as "civil" matters so in theory even if you agree to the AVO in court you should be fine regarding your citizenship. The biggest problem is possible assault charges as they are the only component that could lead to a criminal convinction that may hinder your citizenship. As someone said before, get some character references as a backup plan if you need them. The fact the police didn't charge you indicates they dont have the evidence to do so so I suggest you continue to make no statements to them and listen to the advice of your solicitor.
Thanks for injecting some hope in me, Pimpek. The police in fact mentioned it to me after the interview that there are no charges because of lack of evidence, although they did have pictures of my partner with bruises etc in their possession. I thought I was lucky to be let go at the time because they did mention assault to me over the phone before the interview. My lawyer thinks that it is unlikely for them to charge anyone at a later time unless the police is called again to my house with another domestic situation. If that happens again, they would skip the interview and proceed with the arrest, the police told me.
... which is why you need to move out of your place and go live somewhere else. This person you are with is very unstable and will almost certainly use the police again to try and manipulate you. Whatever feelings or obligations you have, you need to put them aside and use common sense. Dont expose yourself to more problems as she clearly isn't worth the dramas .....
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